You won't even talk to me now. I know I've hurt you. But, haven't you ever thought that by talking to me about how you want to find the one hurts me too? You know? Here I was thinking that we were having a thing. it's the small little details that you let on to make me believe that we're just friends. Okay, so, if we're just friends, why does it matter?
please, explain to me. You can't say that I'm cheating on you, if we're not even together. If we're just friends, why does it matter that you're just another one of the five guys i talk to? Why does it matter ? I really REALLY don't understand.
And, you're not listening to me. You just say what you want to say. I dont have any comebacks to why I dated the other guys. Am i supposed to have reasons? All i know, we were nothing more than friends. I think that I have the right to go out with other guys, no? you see, what's the difference between you and i? I play with my heart, Yes, when i go out with a guy, I start thinking about possibilities of getting together. So what? Don't all girls do that? If i didn't play with my heart, do you actually think we would have came this far?
And do you even know what's the difference between LIKING someone and LOVING someone? I haven't even said I love you to a boy since my first boyfriend. I haven't used such a strong word with anyone after him. Not once did I ever use it with my flings. But, somehow, I said it to you, doesn't that tell you something?
I know, right now, all that's running in your mind is anger. But, settle down, listen to my side of the story too. I waited for you. I definitely did. If i didn't, I wouldn't even give a fucking damn about our skype calls. I wouldn't even fucking bother about telling you exactly why I care about you. I wouldn't even fucking care about you.
I could have gotten together with anyone I wanted in these past few months, you know why i didnt? Because I knew you'd be back in July, ask my friends if you don't believe me. They know, cause everytime they'd ask me why I won't let things go far, I'd tell them this exact reason. I just want to believe that maybe, just maybe, we'll grow to become more than friends.
You want the truth? You're the only one that I always run back to in the end. Maybe I made you feel like you were always my Plan B. That's cause I always thought that you were doing the same. You're in a whole other different country as I am, and I can't control what you do. but, I just hope that at the end of the day, you do come back to me. That's all I wanted.
I admit, i did play with a lot of other guy's feelings. But, did I with yours? Please, enlighten me. Have I ever hurt you before this? I've always apologized the second I knew I did something wrong when it came to you. I know you're fragile after everything that had happened with her. I tried my best to cater to you. I wanted to be the one who make you happy. I wanted to be the one to cheer you up when you needed me to. I wanted you to be able to trust me.
I know you don't believe me anymore. But, you are really the guy that I want to be with. and you telling me that we're just friends is just crap. We're not just friends, and you know that. You wouldn't care about this if you thought we were just friends. But, why won't you admit it?
You're not the only one who's hurting.
